After seeing all the Galapagos iguanas I couldn’t help but think about “Iggy.” Several years ago, Iggy apparently “escaped” from what was at the time a bayside restaurant and bar that had several iguanas and parrots as part of the natural décor. My neighbors thought he was so cute hanging out on the seawall at their house that they named him and began feeding him, which probably wouldn’t have been so bad if he had stayed in their yard.

Iggy was big, maybe not by Galapagos standards, but for my yard, a two foot lizard is big, (tail not included) and not welcomed. I do not want to watch a reptile bask in the sun, and I do not want a reptile watch me do anything. Besides I have read they have really keen eyesight!

My neighbors travel a lot to see their grown children so when they were gone for an extended period, ole Iggy began to “live” on my seawall and eat my flowers, which did not sit well, so I decided to take the situation into my own hands.  One afternoon, I retrieved from the boat the 10-foot pole which is used if one gets stuck in water that is too shallow, and proceeded to push Iggy into the bay, thinking he was a land animal that wouldn’t be able to swim.

I have never seen anything swim so fast or move in such an agile manner as Iggy, who joined me on the deck before I could lay down the pole. I could see I was no longer in control of this situation; actually it became obvious very quickly that I had never been in control so I called for reinforcement from my good friend Judy. Judy is a wonderful friend who I worked with for years. She is one of the most unselfish, patient and caring people I have ever known, but she is extremely bossy and ultra organized. Remember, I am very global. I don’t know if she learned that as a high school principal, but I tend to believe that she was like that at a very early age.

Now, every school district needs a good high school leader who can “boss” and give forthright directions, but since she is retired and no longer has teachers or students to give commands to, that only leaves a small contingency on which to use this attribute. Therefore, I knew that when I asked for Iggy assistance, I was abdicating my power. When Judy leaves this world, I know she will have God and St. Peter working off a “Things to to List” and when the roll is called up yonder she will insist that it be numbered and in alphabetical order. So I was prepared.

First order, “Get a bucket!”  Then almost immediately, “A BIG bucket, Cindy” with a hint of frustration in her otherwise usually patient tone.   “Hurry up; I can’t keep him in this net much longer!!” Next, “find me a top” Now, I’m not normally so frazzled, but I had never caught an iguana before. Well, I didn’t exactly catch this one, but I found a board and handed it to her for the top.

She looked at me incredulously and instructed me to find the keys to the red Jeep so that we could take Iggy to the dunes. Once in the Jeep, I saw no reason to hurry. She seemed to have everything under control, leaning heavily on the board and the bucket when all of a sudden; Iggy tried a sideways, somersault-type roll. “Can’t you drive any faster??”

Thinking that the iguana might jump in my lap, I hit the accelerator at Nascar speed, throwing Judy and Iggy toward the dash, but she held on, and within minutes we were at the last dune reachable by car on the north end of the beach. Carefully, she exited the Jeep, walked slowly to some sea grapes, placed him on the sand, grabbed the bucket and ran back to the Jeep. “Move over. I’ll drive.”

Iggy turned to look. “Go,” Judy instructed, “move on.” When all else fails, boss an iguana.

A month or so later the neighbors arrived home. After a couple of days without Iggy waiting for them on the seawall, they yelled over, “Have you seen Iggy” “No, it’s been awhile,” I replied and left it at that.